Intake file

Vern

Vern has a squared-off, useful appearance and the visual confidence of an object that knows exactly what a paperweight is for, in the strictly metaphorical sense.

Estimated age

1.6 billion years

Temperament

Grounded, blocky, and clearly qualified for paperwork

Favorite activities

serving as a paperweight, staying low, making a table look established

Before Sanctuary

Vern was found on a legally accessible section of private land near a barn foundation. He entered Sanctuary care only after the landowner confirmed he would be missed primarily by no one.